Racism Thwarted Thanks to Social Media

Former Racist Ellen Degeneres
Former Racist Ellen Degeneres

Burbank, CA – Thanks to a cadre of people on Twitter Monday, racist Ellen Degeneres was thwarted from spreading her divisive, white privilege message to the world when she tweeted herself riding on the back of world’s fastest man Usain Bolt.  People who had gone nearly minutes without being outraged by something quickly piled a dung heap of shame on the unsuspecting Degeneres forcing her to cry and immediately become a better person.

Professional shamer Lindsay Telson told reporters in an interview Wednesday that she was glad she could be one the first to strike shame into the heart of the unsuspecting comedienne. “Some people might have looked at the picture and taken time to consider what it was really trying to say, but I’ve become really good at spotting racism having used Twitter for many years now.”  When asked whether she was still going to continue to fight, a weary but resolute Telson responded “Racism requires all the vigilance that social media can muster.  That’s why I follow so many entertainers and people of import not only on Twitter, but Facebook, Instagram and Snapchat.  People look up to them, and if I can be the first to call them out on their racism I know that such attitudes will soon disappear.  Fighting complex and long time problems like racism 140 characters at a time is such a satisfying feeling.  Also,” added Telson, “you get more people favoriting your tweets and more followers.  So you can fight racism together.”

Long time shamer Randy Loeffler, who also helped shame Ellen, said shaming is a lot more in depth.  “You see,” said a thoughtful Loeffler, “good shaming isn’t just about being first it’s about the level of outrage you display or how piercing your comment is to the person you are trying to shame.  That’s really how you get people to favorite your tweet and follow you.  I’m not saying being quick doesn’t matter, but I feel shaming is more nuanced.”  Reporters took the opportunity to further question the experienced shamer to understand the shaming community better, “I’m not really fond of the term shamer.  I mean it’s true, but I think of myself as more of the social police.  We’re a community you know.  In fact in my area we started a Facebook group called Outrage Outreach.  Not a great name, but the person who thought of it was shamed appropriately.  It’s nice to get a chance to get together in real life with fellow shamers.  We don’t get to talk much to each other, but every once in a while we’re sitting at the table looking at our phones, somebody will call out something shameworthy that a celebrity has posted and we’ll all get on it.  It’s a lot of fun, being outraged together and in person.”

But shamer Destiny Carter painted a more complex and discordant view of the shaming community.  “First,” said a serious Carter, “shaming can be exhausting.  You might start with shaming a celebrity, but then some people will support that celebrity’s racist tweet, and then you have to start shaming the supporters too then they shame you back.  And it’s like there’s this bond you know because you clearly both like shaming, but you’re at odds.”  Carter then became pensive before adding, “Personally I have found it hard to find good friends among my fellow shamers.  One time I went out with one of them on a date.  We didn’t talk much, but we I liked the fact that we were getting really outraged, so we had sex.  But when actually talking after sex, while our phones recharged, it turned out that we felt very vulnerable and uncomfortable getting to know each other as people.  The outrage that brought us together was gone. So I tweeted him the next day that I had fun, but that I didn’t think we should go out anymore.  He got upset and tried to fat shame me because of his concerns to stop obesity and this forced me to shame him back to stop misogyny.  I am sure he’s a better person now as a result of it.  I don’t know…I had to block him when he started to slut shame me.”

To get a better perspective on shaming on social media, this reporter talked to Dr. Leonard Orville at Cornell University  who said that social media has really led to a lot of healing in the U.S. today.  “I don’t want to be too bold in my prediction, but I think that if we are able to maintain this level of shaming, by the year 2025 problems like racism will be a thing of the past.  So many celebrities, athletes, politicians, and just regular everyday people are being shamed into a more egalitarian mindset and society is being mended at an alarming rate as a result.  Hold on…is that a dreamcatcher on your tie?  That’s cultural appropriation.  Let me get my phone to take a picture.”

37 thoughts on “Racism Thwarted Thanks to Social Media

  1. Pingback: Racism Thwarted Thanks to Social Media – Cloak Unfurled | Just Merveilleux

            1. Not sure what Cousin It is, but I’m paying the price for being 42 with no signs of balding…”Oh you like having your hair…well now you can have it everywhere” Mwuhahaha!


  2. “Long time shamer” – Hahahahahah. This is all quite brilliant Swarn, your fears re satire appearing from your fingers are now quelled I hope! Very, very funny. Thank you for the morning guffaws.

    Cousin It –

    – esme combing rapunzel-like hgair (not on her bum) upon the Cloud

    Liked by 3 people

  3. Buggrit. I was told in no uncertain terms that the word “transsexual” was not really acceptable, now, and I feel if I utter the term “gender-critical” in front of that person it will be a “Burn the Witch” moment. I don’t want burned yet. The trouble is, people who have been shamed themselves for ordinary human diversity when they start to assert themselves can get angry, and other nice liberals try to be allies.

    Why can’t we all get along?

    Liked by 2 people

    1. Agreed Clare. I ask that same question a 100 times a day it seems.

      My goal in this bit of satire was to also simply point out that 1) Making assumption about someone’s character based on such a minute portion of what they’re exposing is not fair judgment and 2) Shaming has been proven to be an ineffective means to educating and changing behavior even if we were right about someone’s prejudiced or bigoted nature. Thus I feel that good intentions are not always the personal motivator in this type of behavior. I am not saying people want to be malicious and mean but I do think that the short blurb fast-paced world of social media diminishes our empathy, and is reductive to complex and nuanced issues.

      Thank you for reading for your comment. 🙂


      1. I understand the need for PC to an extent, but for the most part I feel that the PC movement might want to try wearing underwear with a better fit. Or wear some grown up britches. IOW people tend to take these things too far, or are standing around just waiting for someone to accidentally bump that chip off of their shoulder.

        Liked by 1 person

  4. Jeanine

    This is just so great, I laughed from beginning to end. People really seemed to have hopped on the “dragging” bandwagon where the second anyone slightly missteps in their social graces the internet collectively attacks them. There’s a happy medium between blatantly ignoring clearly offensive behavior and berating anyone who says or does something that’s misinformed. The social justice warrior police might want to take that into consideration 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you Jeanine. I’m glad you enjoyed my bit of satire. 🙂

      I agree with you. I also think there are better venues than social media even when there is actually something to complain about as social media seems to quickly degenerate to name calling and be very reductive to issues that require more thought and discussion.


      1. Yes, so I noticed. I read the comments as well. People are ridiculous.

        Jamaicans are nowhere near as sensitive about race as Americans. But with the influence of social media, African Americans get upset and we feel the need to rally behind them to “show support”. It’s ridiculous. It’s so sad watching Jamaica become infected with this hypersensitivity to race. I hope they didn’t join in on the nonsense this time around. I wasn’t online to witness…

        Liked by 1 person

        1. It’s hard to say… There was a mixture of black and white tweets. Yeah I wouldn’t have thought Jamaicans would have been super sensitive so when I saw the story I was just like “really? That’s ridiculous”. Thank you for reading and sharing your perspective!

          Liked by 1 person

          1. Well you wouldn’t know unless you’re Jamaican, I think. We’re a tiny island, so you either follow Jamaicans or you don’t haha. I guess I’ll find out later when I hop on Twitter.

            And no problem. My pleasure. 🙂


  5. Take the Floor

    I just started a blog after seeing the disgust over social media after the election. I wanted to speak but I am a teacher and friend and was concerned over expressing my thoughts. So I created “Take the Floor” where people like me could ask questions about politics, racism, education etc and receive true, honest opinions with anonymity. As a new blogger I would love some views, comments, open questions for others on the topic. Please share your thoughts I would love that! I enjoyed reading your post.

    Liked by 1 person

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